Engage!!

My pastor preached and awesome message a few weeks ago about being engaged in life, in our relationship with God. That night I came home so on fire that I wanted to write about it. I feel like a lot of the fire has  already faded from, me but that is the problem to begin with.
I sometimes wonder if my priorities are messed up. I am now selling Pampered Chef, which I love. I am finding it a fun way to make ends meet. But sometimes I think I need to sell everything in my house to pay off my student loans (probably do not have enough to sell...but you get the idea) and live a simple life. Having 2-3 outfits, eating basic simple meals (got that covered). No tv. Limited internet (required for school  work). I have had friends that lived that way and they seemed so at peace. Can I do that? I don't know, but I want to get off the train. So where do I want to go? Well for one I want to find a place that gives me enough time to blog more than once a month. Now to those of you that may be reading me you are probably thinking ohhhh once a month is enough for you. But think about the others out there that have not discovered the joy of reading my work (read with a little sarcasm in your head).
But back to priorities, do I spend enough time at home with my family? I spend so much planning my lessons and grading papers when do I have time to read in the bible? Spend time with God? I thought I was slow with lesson planning, go and find out I am slow on everything. Takes me forever to do small PC tasks too. I think if I had a little more time I could put a little effort into Pampered chef and make more money to help us get the car we need. But where would I find the time?...there is none so I sit back and say enough, be at peace with what you can do.
So where does that leave me ? Busy and distracted. But not engaged:(   I remember when I was going to school, working, and raising the girls I would pray Oh Lord do not let me lose You. If I graduate and get "it all" but do not have you, then I have nothing. I miss God, the close fellowship we had, but I am so overloaded that I am definitely this side of "dead" in my spirit. Definitely not engaged. So how do I take the message and run with it. I want to be engaged with Jesus again. I want to pray, not because I am supposed to but because I look forward to spending time with my friend and Savior. Because I know deep down when I  reconnect with Him I begin to find me. Engage Mary engage!! Its my Saviors call to me.